- writing from midnight to twilight - short stories and miscellaneous journal by Esther Avila
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Toasting to a Fresh Start
WEDNESDAY, JULY 15, 2009
Toasting to a Fresh Start
April looked around her new bedroom. It was perfect.
“Everything had to be white. That’s what I told him,” she told her best friend Nicky as she let herself fall on top of the white down’s comforter on her white wrought iron bed.
Across the small room, lit candles reflected two sad faces off the mirror of a white dresser.
“I still can’t believe you said yes? You don’t love him,” Nicky said. “It’s not too late. Call your parents. Tell them you want to go home.”
“I have no family,” April answered quietly as she looked at long-stem white roses adorning the bedside table. “They threw me out. He saved me. I owe him this.”
“That doesn’t mean you have to marry him.”
Nicky tried to talk some last minute sense into her friend. In a few hours it would be too late. The wedding was scheduled for morning.
April looked at her maid of honor – her only real friend – the only person who really knew her.
Removing a bottle of wine from under the bed, April poured red wine into a single goblet.
“Some things have to be red,” April said, sharing the wine with Nicky who sobbed quietly.
“Don’t cry, my love. I’m not going to marry Jack,” April said, brushing her wine-tasting, arsenic-covered lips against Nicky’s. “Don’t be scared. In vino veritas. No one can ever separate us again.”
quite the twist! :)
JULY 15, 2009 6:36 PM
JULY 15, 2009 6:57 PM
Romantic! Except...poor Jack!
JULY 15, 2009 8:01 PM
I had a gut instinct that these two were more than friends.
JULY 15, 2009 8:21 PM
I missed major clues and was caught by surprise. Nice ending.
JULY 15, 2009 9:52 PM
I didn't see that coming! That is a great entry!
JULY 15, 2009 10:27 PM
Thank you. I meant for the all-white to help take the eyes away from the few small hints that they might be more than friends. And I loved the contrast of the red wine against an all-white background. It's one of those things where you go back and read and see it was there all along. :) Thanks guys.
JULY 15, 2009 10:50 PM
Deb S said...
Poor Juliet and Juliet:-)
JULY 16, 2009 10:19 AM
JULY 16, 2009 1:32 PM
Hi Esther! :-) I loved the all white setting with the glass of red. I totally saw that in my head as I was reading. Sad ending! Left me wondering why it had to be that way, why couldn't they just be together, living? Aw.
JULY 17, 2009 8:04 AM
I was caught off guard, but then I think I knew it!
JULY 17, 2009 1:33 PM
Deb S, two in a row! Great line.
It is terribly selfish of April to determine her friend's fate like that. I would agree with the Juliet & Juliet thing if both Juliets had a choice in the matter, but only one decided for both. It kind of gets me a little peeved. No wonder April doesn't have any other friends and her parents kicked her out. Selfish little thing.
JULY 18, 2009 2:28 AM
April's a bit shortsighted.
JULY 18, 2009 8:33 AM
This sounds to me like the preface of a novel. I want to know what happens (and what happened)...maybe Nicky fights back somehow or has an antidote. Or maybe this is the end of the story...good job.
JULY 18, 2009 12:08 PM
Loved the contrast of the white room and red wine - very visual.
JULY 18, 2009 4:04 PM
lol @ Deb S.
People are surely finding their funny bone towards the end here. :)
I liked this one. Kiss of death. My most preferred choice of death. :D
JULY 19, 2009 2:28 PM
Poor Jack too. To think the poor sod went and paid for the white room for the perfect suicide/murder.
April's quite the selfish cow. ;0)
JULY 20, 2009 5:37 PM
Oh!! This is really well-written, on so many levels. Great characterizations, great twist! LOVE it!!
JULY 20, 2009 7:24 PM
Thank you for the nice comments. And, PJD - I am glad the story "peeved" you off. That means you got into it. Yes, she was a little selfish. I originally had a couple more graphs in there where Nicki suggests tainting the wine but the word count stood at 285. I had to cut it down and finally settled for this simpler way.
JULY 22, 2009 12:34 AM
him. That stings. But it's real. People do much out of a sense of obligation.
Welcome to The Forties Club!
JULY 27, 2009 10:04 AM
Nice use of color and a great twist. Good job!
JULY 29, 2009 9:38 PM
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