Waiting on a Miracle

I am very excited and honored to learn that I earned an Honorable Mention - and I made it into the "Forties Club" - with this story I submitted into Clarity of Night's recent contest. (Members of the Clarity of Night Forties Club are entries scoring 40 or higher out of 45 possible points.) For those of you who missed my story, here it is:
Entry #125
Waiting on a Miracle
by Esther Avila

Jack watched the television, his mouth open at the scene unfolding at Fashion Point Mall -- police tape, metal, skin, and chaos.

“Unbelievable!” he said to himself as the phone rang.

“Hey, are you watching the news?” Kyle asked. “Can you believe it?”

Just the day before, Jack and Kyle met for dinner -- and a few drinks.

“Stop being such a baby. If I were in that wheelchair, I wouldn’t be such a whiner,” Kyle had said.“I dare you to spend the whole evening in a wheelchair.”

The deal was on. Heading to the mall, Kyle obtained a chair and proceeded to maneuver around the shops.

“Nothing to it,” he said. “I bet my grandma could do this blindfolded.”

“Tell me that after you take the stairs.”

Kyle headed to the escalator, ignoring the warning: Strollers and Wheelchairs Prohibited.

“Don’t do it Kyle. I was kidding.”

Too late.Jack felt helpless as he watched his best friend tumble to the bottom of the stairs.

Laughing, Kyle stood, thankful for the beers that cushioned the fall.

A concerned crowd had gathered around him.“I can walk,” Kyle yelled as he stood and pushed away the chair. “It’s a miracle!”

Jack’s attention turned back to the pretty reporter on the news.

“…..two people are in critical condition and four others in serious condition after they rolled their wheelchairs down the escalator, apparently looking for a miracle. A man in his mid 20s was miraculously healed yesterday …..”

33 Comments:

McKoala said...
Appreciated your twist!
January 15, 2009 12:23 AM

kunal said...
good ending .. riveting in a way.
January 15, 2009 1:01 AM

Lena said...
that was some good twist. but somehow it is good that people still believe in miracles, even though it does not work out always. Well written!
January 15, 2009 1:36 AM

*~*{Sameera}*~* said...
Ha ha!That was a good read,and relieving too :)
January 15, 2009 3:35 AM

K.Lawson Gilbert said...
Unique take. Good writing skills - I like the way the story unfolded. (Kyle needs an attitude adjustment- lol)
January 15, 2009 7:14 AM

Scott said...
Things just work out for some people! I loved your take on the picture; this was a fun-to-read piece.
January 15, 2009 7:35 AM

laughingwolf said...
nice twist :)
January 15, 2009 7:45 AM

Aerin said...
oh, my gosh. such a great story - LOVE this
January 15, 2009 8:35 AM

wrath999 said...
Cool and enjoyable tale
January 15, 2009 9:08 AM

RiverSoul said...
Loved the macabre twist...Heh! Heh! Server them right for blindly believing everything they see.:DDo read my story too.:)#86.:)
January 15, 2009 9:26 AM

peggy said...
what a twisty ending. good job!
January 15, 2009 12:18 PM

BernardL said...
Ouch! Well done.
January 15, 2009 1:11 PM

Aine said...
Oh!! Fabulous! And, sadly, so true to human nature. You had me on the edge of my seat until the scene was revealed.Loved it!!:)
January 15, 2009 4:23 PM

Patsy said...
I wasn't expecting that.
January 15, 2009 4:55 PM

Jaye Wells said...
Loved the punch line. Thanks for the laugh.
January 15, 2009 5:24 PM

Anonymous said...
Wicked! Loved it.John McAuley
January 15, 2009 7:11 PM

bluesugarpoet said...
Nice twist at the end - completely unexpected! - jana
January 15, 2009 9:50 PM

Catvibe said...
I really love the ending!
January 16, 2009 10:52 AM

BrownPhantom said...
Nothing prepared me for the end. Very fuuny :).-Prashant Dhanke
January 16, 2009 12:16 PM

iLL Man said...
Never be shy of a sick joke........... =DMinimal fuss in the telling and the gag came out of nowhere. Nicely done.Ewen.
January 16, 2009 8:44 PM

pjd said...
Like everyone else, I love the brilliant twist. The buildup really sells it.
January 17, 2009 1:53 AM

Senorita said...
LOL...great writing... loved the end :)
January 17, 2009 11:32 AM

September said...
Thank you for reading it and commenting. It sure was fun writing it. I got the idea after my daughter tripped on one and jokingly said the same thing after standing up (though not on stairs)and being a news reporter, I had to throw one into the story. :)I've enjoyed reading all of the other stories too. I am almost done too. There sure were a lot of them. Thanks again.
January 17, 2009 10:55 PM

sawan said...
Esther, tht was a grt grt story and a grt msg too..
January 18, 2009 12:56 PM

Terry said...
Esther, such inspired writing! I could really see your characters, and I loved the line, "...thankful for the beers that cushioned the fall." I've dated this idiot. Fun read with an outrageous twist.
January 18, 2009 3:23 PM

Geraldine said...
Naughty but nice. Tres interesting take on this photo prompt!
January 18, 2009 11:20 PM

September said...
Sawan, Terry and Geraldine - Aww...You guys warmed my heart and made me smile. Thank you so much for the kind and uplifting comments.
January 19, 2009 3:22 AM

ceedy said...
Nice story...and a good message...What the heck take a chance will ya.....
January 19, 2009 12:05 PM

Sarah Hina said...
I loved this one, Esther! Such a natural unfolding of events, making the twist that much more memorable. You did so much right with this joke gone wrong. :) Expertly written, with convincing characters and dialogue. The desire to believe can lead people to do crazy things. Well done!
January 19, 2009 2:11 PM

September said...
Ceedy and Sarah, thank you so very much for your comments. They mean a lot to me.Everyone: Well, I read every single story in the contest - all 125 of them, and some of them I read two to three times. I also commented on each and every one.Wonderful little contests Jason runs. They are fun to write, and even more fun to read and learn.
January 20, 2009 2:40 AM

Terry said...
Thanks for giving us another wonderful example of how it's done! Congratulations on placing so highly in this talented little pond.
January 20, 2009 12:52 PM

jason evans (contest official) said...
Congratulations on the honorable mention!Great job with pacing, entertainment value, technical skill, storytelling, and voice! And welcome to the Forties Club!!Thanks for being a wonderful part of the contest.January 20, 2009 11:01 PM

September said...
Oh Terry - You're too kind. Thank you.Jason: Thank you for all of the hours you put into this. Your contests and comments are greatly appreciated and have encouraged me to take a leap of faith. I write newspaper articles but my heart and soul wants to move towards short stories again - and I want to continue with my novel once more...thank you for re-firing me up.
January 21, 2009 12:23 PM

Countdown with Keith Olbermann

My angel story has caught the attention of Keith Olbermann - it was mentioned in his "let's play oddball" section of his July 31 "Countdown with Keith Olbermann" show.

That is so cool!

And, more exciting news....my Angel stories are bringing in record hits at the office -- almost 10,000 hits in less than a week!! -- a record for us!

Of course, I've had a few phonecalls from people saying "how dare you write this" -- but I never said I believed or didn't believe it was an angel or Jesus on the Cross -- I simply reported what people out there were doing and saying.

Stay tuned for another story soon. I'm already working on story number three.

If you missed my last story, click here.

Angel gone but Jesus and Virgin Mary in palm tree

Wow. Just when I thought I had heard it all - something new comes along. The angel on the window is gone but guess what? It was replaced by an image of Jesus on a nearby tree.
I went to report on it tonight and there were so many people, it took forever to get out of there and back to the office. I had to drive through a couple of parking lots and then take the back roads all the way to Morton Avenue and return to the office the long way back.
Talk about a fun day! (I also worked on a couple of other stories - new superintendent for Alta Vista school district and a story about a patient from a developmental center who escaped and is still missing.)
To read the image story - click here.

Angels in the newsroom

Photo by Esther Avila

I had a most interesting day today - covering everything from visiting with Chinese children, followed by a police chase and shooting, an afternoon covering boat races and photographing children in the lake, and finishing the day by covering the sudden appearance of an angel in a window.
Oh yes, today was a fun news reporting day.
Can my job be any more interesting?
Did I mention that I absolutely love my work?
I do. I do. I do. I do. I do.

Angel appears on local window

Recommended 13

July 24, 2008 - 7:02PM

By ESTHER AVILA

THE PORTERVILLE RECORDER

The appearance of what appears to be the image of an angel on a local business window has several Porterville residents flocking to the location in hopes of seeing the angel, with halo, that appears to be flying.
The image has been appearing after dark for several nights, said Debrah Dattoli, who captured it on video.
People have been gathering after dark at Carpet Plus Colortile, 1043 W. Olive Ave., to catch a glimpse of the angel.
To read the full story - click here.

I'm sorry - this story appears to be gone. However, I did write a couple of other stories on this topic.
See two stories below.

Angelic sighting attracting crowds to Porterville store
Posted: Monday, July 28, 2008 12:00 am

By ESTHER AVILA

(Recorder photo by Esther Avila)

Age didn't matter, and neither did religion, as more than 200 men, women and children gathered Friday evening in one accord — to see firsthand if an image of what appears to be an angel on the window of a local business was real.

"It's unexplainable," said Debra Dattoli, when she brought a video of the image to the Porterville Recorder on Thursday. "It has actually been there over a year now."

Once Dattoli reported the angelic image — which spans across two large storefront windows at Carpet Plus Colortile at 1043 W. Olive Ave. — large crowds flocked to the area.

Fathers lifted their young children and pointed to the image. Others brought their cameras and used their cell phones to call family, friends and loved ones — inviting them to come see for themselves — the angel that has been making appearances night after night. Most of the people arrived in large crowds, bringing their families and friends along. Most of the people talked excitedly but a couple of people stood silently, as if in awe, one with tears.

"It's amazing. We're Catholic — we do believe in Virgin Mary appearances but very seldom do we see an appearance of an angel. It's a blessing," said Sylvia Trevino of Porterville. "We're true believers. I have a feeling this will go national. This is huge. There's a reason why this is here."

Many in attendance expressed similar sentiments.

"It says in the Bible, Acts 2, that in the end days there will be signs and wonders," said Maria Hurtado, who said she attends a Porterville non-denominational church. "I was in a bad mood before coming but once I got here, it had a calming affect on me. This is a way of God saying ‘I'm coming.'"

Hurtado said people keep trying to figure out what is causing the image.

"Not me. I just accept it. In Proverbs 3, it says that we should not lean on our own understanding," Hurtado said. "They should just accept it and trust in God."

Brothers Adrian and Joe Soto arrived with their father and with friends. Though Adrian Soto said he was a bit skeptical, Joe Soto said he wanted to know why it suddenly appeared.

"I'm not sure what to think," Joe Soto, said. "This is something you don't see every day. I'm not sure how to react to it. I heard of it today so we all came over. It's funny how everybody's gathering to see it."

One woman, Angelina Briones, said she captured the image on video — opening and closing her eyes.

"We came last night and I caught it on film," she said as she showed several people her video. "They say in the Bible that there will be signs. This is a sign. I like it."

The stories continued, with resident after resident sharing their stories, photos and videos with those around them.

"It's beautiful. Our town needed a sign like this. It's exciting to see all the people. We needed this to keep the faith," said Aimee Navarro. "I read about it in the paper. You can't believe it till you see it so I came with my nephew, brother, cousins and friends. We don't see too many positive signs like this and we needed it after [Friday's] stabbing and shooting. People should come and see this."

Owners of the business, Ronald and Teri Johnson, said during a television interview that they believed the bright image was created by an odd reflection. But after rearranging racks and other store items, the reflection continued — night after night.

Teri Johnson said: "I think our angel is sent here from God and watches over us because we pray all the time for our business and our family."

-- Contact Esther Avila at 784-5000, Ext. 1047 or eavila@portervillerecorder.com.

People seeing new image - Jesus on the cross

Posted: Wednesday, July 30, 2008 12:00 am

By ESTHER AVILA

Recorder Photo by Esther Avila 

 An image of what appeared to look like an angel on the window of a local store is gone but a sea of people longing to catch a glimpse of the heavenly creature flocked to the site tonight hoping to see not only the angel but also something new — an image of Jesus Christ hanging on the cross on a nearby palm tree.

“I went looking for the angel and it was gone,” Robert Sanchez said today. “Then someone said Christ was there and I looked up and I saw him. Christ was on the cross, arms out, head down, his beard, his eyes — down to the last detail. You can see his ribs and his stance with his knees up and arms hanging to the side. I was thrilled. To have two sightings in the same place — it confirms that the image on the window was not fake.”

Sanchez said he saw the new image around 8:45 p.m. Monday and again at 2 a.m. today when he returned with his family.

Two Porterville police officers and the PPD traffic patrol supervisor monitored the activity tonight.

“We’re out here to make sure everyone is safe,” said traffic patrol supervisor Mark Acevedo. “Other than the traffic issues, there have been no problems.”

Crowds of people could be seen on both sides of Olive Avenue. Some people parked east of the highway and walked to the 1000 block of West Olive Avenue.

Most of the crowd could be seen taking photographs. Some claimed to see it, some didn’t. Television crews were interviewing people.

The Rev. Steve Benton, pastor from Hope Restoration Ministries in Poplar, placed a cross at the base of the palm tree.

Recorder Photo by Esther Avila

“My wife and I were here to share our faith with the people who are drawn to this image in the window,” Benton said. “I have been out here for two nights and never saw it myself but these people are looking for something to fill the vacuum in their lives. That is why I put up the cross, because it is an image that is really clear. People are looking for something. People are looking for hope.”

Porterville resident Trina Leon said her heart felt heavy when she saw the people.

“My heart just sank. People want to believe,” Leon said. “I said ‘People, this is not of God.’ It was an illusion. I call it mass hysteria. People want to have hope but that hope needs to lie in God. Instead of turning to a palm tree or a window, they need to look for God.”

The angel in the window turned out to be nothing more than reflections of light from the mini mart across the street. But people who have been gathering at the site are not convinced.

“People will see whatever they want to see. That’s imagination,” Adel Joudi, owner of Xpress Gas and Minit Mart, said. “The angel has been there since I opened the store two years ago. It was a light reflection. If I turn on the light, it is there. If the light is off, it is gone.”

Nearly 400 people arrived Monday night to see the angel, he said.

“I had to call the police,” Joudi said. “They couldn’t control the crowd. I had to shut my store down for two hours while they got all the cars out of here.”

Joudi said he was forced to turn off the lights directly under the overhang of his business to prove to the people that the angel was caused by a light reflection.

“But people wouldn’t believe it. They wouldn’t leave. They hung around the area until 1 a.m. to see if the angel would return,” Joudi said. “I just want them to go away. I want them to know that the angel will not return. I have a business. I just want people to respect my business.”

Across the street, the owners of Color Tile, Ron and Teri Johnson, also talked about the mass crowd.

“There were so many people [Monday] night. They were in the street, in the street median, in the parking lots, at the empty brick house across the street, in the empty field — they were everywhere. It was unbelievable,” Ron Johnson said. “It is wonderful and exciting and nice but I don’t think it is a miracle.”

-- Contact Esther Avila at 784-5000, Ext. 1047 or eavila@portervillerecorder.com.

WORLD SERIES: Rockies pitchers Jeff Francis and Ubaldo Jimenez and my daughters

It is so exciting to watch baseball when your boys are playing - and I mean that literally. The great thing about minor league baseball is that you get to know the players before they disappear into the big leagues .

Jeff Francis with my daughter Jennifer / May 2003
Jeff Francis with my daughter Catherine / August 2003


Sometimes, as in Jeff Francis' case, they are here only for a little while. Other times they stay for a couple of seasons before we have to say goodbye.

But because I was an active member in the Visalia Oaks Booster Club since 1998 (six years as secretary and board member, wrote mission statement) we knew our boys very well.

In fact, several of them have eaten in our home. And Jeff Francis' family (Uncle) used to invite my children and I to their home in British Columbia. Now it is so exciting to see Jeff Francis pitching the first game of the World Series - needless to say I am cheering for the Colorado Rockies!

Jeff Francis is not the only one - we have several - FIVE - former players -- representing our Visalia Oaks in the World Series.

In the National League - left-hander Jeff Francis (2003) is starting - impressive - he only stayed in Single A one season and quickly moved up - making it to the majors for a cup of coffee his second season - eventually staying there for good. Now he's their No. 1 pitcher. He has been outstanding in his two post-season starts, boasting a 2-0 record and a 2.13 ERA. Jeff has had unbelievable control, striking out 12 and walking just 3 in 12.2 innings.

The Rockies second starter is also someone we know - Ubaldo Jimenez (2003-2004) - and he is just as impressive as Jeff Francis. He has a quick fastball and a 1.59 ERA. Ubaldo has plenty of "swings and misses" - striking out 11 in 11 1/2 innings.

Ryan Speier (2003) has yet to give up an earned run in the 2007 postseason. He has collected one save in two outings and has given up one hit and no walks in 2.1 innings pitched.

Rockies outfielders Ryan Spilborghs (2004) -- batting .300 through five of seven games, scoring three times, and has an on-base percentage upwards of .450
and Jeff Baker (2004) batting .667 (2 for 3) and has one RBI

sidenote: When the Rockies played the Diamondbacks in the playoffs - I got to see three more Oaks players there -- Justin Upton(2007 Oaks player - imagine going from Single A to the majors in the same year) Jeff Salazar (2003-2004 Oaks player) and Eric Byrnes (1998 Oaks
player)


Jeff offers advice on how to hold and throw a baseball correctly











Jeff Francis watches Jennifer pitch







Jeff Francis pitching to Jennifer








Jennifer at bat - Jeff Francis pitches to her






(all photos by Esther Avila)

Ubaldo Jimenez with Catherine and Jennifer, 2003

Please send Miss Eleanor a postcard

UP DATE: September 5, 2007 - I drove by her work, and there she was - wearing a "thank you" on her outfit. Isn't she beautiful?

How it started:

I printed the request below on my writers online community - and I have been really pleased with the positive response I've received from everyone. It is all in fun - so I'd thought I'd share it here too.


Please send Missy a postcard

---

There is a mannequin near my home in front of a restaurant-supply store (about two blocks from my house) She sits out there every day - dressed in a professional chef coat and chef hat. We call her "Missy" and ever since the kids were little, we'd wave at her every time we drove by. It all started innocently about several years ago - I told them she was a real person who was out there. We met her when I took a wrong turn on the way to school and the girls asked where I was going...

"I want to drive this way to wave to my friend Eleanor," I said and then pointed to her as we drove by. They said it was a fake person, I claimed she was real. We still call her Eleanor when we drive by and a postcard or two has her listed as Eleanor -- but later, when we wrote Ms.Mannequin on the card, we started calling her Missy.

While in Hawaii recently, one daughter said, "Lets send Missy a postcard" -- so we did and we had such fun, we have sent her cards from everywhere we have gone this summer -- Texas, Oregon, etc.

We never really say who we are, just that we are thinking of her and hope that someday she can join us or that someday she can take a trip or we just ask how she is and how the restaurant business is going, etc. Very G-rated. Nothing bad.

It suddenly reminded me of the gnome story -- obviously we can't steal "Missy" to photograph her all over the world - she's human size - not a little gnome.

But I do wonder what the heck the business owner must think every time a card comes in. We've sent at least a dozen.

So, here is my request: If you can, can you please send "Missy" a postcard from where ever you live? And when you do - let me know here so that I can keep track as to how many states are sending (sent) a card. I'd love for her to get them from all over - from California to Seattle to New York to Florida - and from other countries too -- from Canada to Mexico and across the oceans from India to Australia - where ever you all are. You don't have to write much, "hello from Alabama" or whatever state or country will suffice.

But PLEASE - if you do write something -- keep it very clean. It is nothing illegal - just sending friendly post cards.

Miss Eleanor Mannequin
C/O Handley's Restaurant Equipment
400 N. Johnson St.
Visalia, CA 93291

Thanks, everyone.
Missy (Eleanor) thanks you too!

__________________

Take Out Your Mont Blancs - "Table for Eight"

I'm very excited! -- I made the Readers' Choice category.

Readers' Choice, 1st Runner-Up -- ESTHER AVILA, Table for Eight (story below)

TUESDAY, APRIL 24, 2007

Entry #31

Table for Eight

by Esther Avila

“Perfect,” Emma said to herself as she placed a small vase with a handful of daisies in the center of a small round table. Eight veneer dessert plates were already carefully placed – each on a pretty paper doily.

Emma glanced at the clock before smoothing her blue dress down with both of her hands.

She loved the color of the dress – and the matching blue ribbon keeping her long ponytail in place. It reminded her of the robin eggs she had seen while on a picnic with her mother.

“Look here, Emma,” her mother had said as the 9-year-old child peeked into the nest. “New life will begin soon.”

Emma tried to remember what they talked about. But she couldn’t. She missed her mother and she tried not to think of the day her mother left.

Emma peered out the large window. Her mother had called and promised to join her for tea. But there was no sign of anyone coming.

“Emma Johnson – a most interesting case,” said Dr. Jason Sanders to three young psychiatrist interns as they watched the little girl in the blue hospital gown through a two-way mirror. “Child Protective Services picked her up from a filthy home. Her mother had been dead for two days – alcohol and overdose. Poor kid. As they took her from her home, she ran to the sink and salvaged those little dishes. She sets that table every day and waits.”

April 29: Winners announced

1st Place--TREVOR RECORD, Sleep
2nd Place--SEAN FERRELL, Talking Down the Flames
3rd Place--REBECCA HENDRICKS, Superstar
4th Place--JAYE WELLS, Werewife
5th Place--KATHERINE NAPIER, Reality Bytes
Honorable Mention--JUDE ENSAFF, Case #453
Honorable Mention--BRILLIANT DONKEY, Its All Relative
Honorable Mention--BETH, Things We Cannot Say
Honorable Mention--G. LI, Afterglow'
Honorable Mention--JOHN MCAULEY, Steak & Pork Brains
Readers' Choice--JAYE WELLS, Werewife
Readers' Choice, 1st Runner-Up -- ESTHER AVILA, Table for Eight (story above)

ALSO - I want to let you know about another writing opportunity. My blog friend, Bhaswati, has posted about a project about an author calling upon other writers to help compile and publish a book to raise funds for a young child who suffers from apraxia. Check it out.